Stay Connected with Your Children Through Chores

 

Use Chores to Stay Connected with Your Kid

Staying connected to our children is important. One of the ways that we can do that is by doing chores with them. Trust me. I am aware that you gave you gave your kids chores to teach them responsibility, and you might want them to complete them on their own. However, doing chores with your kids is a time for you guys to bond and to connect. 

Let me explain. It really isn’t about the chores. It’s more about spending time with your children and building bonds. Encourage your child to talk to you while you're doing your chores. So, it doesn’t matter if you are doing the dishes or cleaning the bathroom together. What matters most is that you are communicating.

The Purpose of Chores

What’s the big deal about chores anyway? Well, chores have a lot of merit. Chores teach your children real world skills. These are skills that they will need and use for the rest of their lives. Those skills include responsibility, work ethics, self-reliance, and time management. 

By holding them accountable for their chores, you are teaching your kids to take ownership for their actions. This in turn will help to teach them responsibility and help them to develop a good work ethic for later in life.

Tasks such a doing the laundry, budgeting, and washing dishes are life skills. By learning how to complete these tasks, your children will learn how to be self-reliant.

Time management can be taught through chores. When you children have to learn how to complete homework and still get their chores done, they learn how to management their time more effectively.

When I was in high school, I played basketball and that often meant having to complete homework and still being able to compete in sports. I can remember one of my teammates working on homework while we drove to the upcoming game. Plus, she was still responsible for chores when she got home. She was a phenomenal athlete and a great student. Her parents had adequately taught her how to manage her time.

By doing chores with your children, you can help them to become better at time management. And, you are also teaching them other skills that they will need later.

Open the Lines of Communication

If this is something new and you want to reconnect with your kids, start slow. Begin by asking them a few simple questions.

Ø  Ask them how their day was.

Ø  Ask them if they have any concerns or other issues.

Ø  Ask them about school.

Ø  Ask them about their friends.

It really doesn’t matter what you ask them about. The goal is to get them to talk to you. As you continue this routine, your kids and you will become more comfortable sharing chores and talking.

Actively Listen

Be sure to listen actively. What it mean to listen actively? Active listening means to make a conscious effort to hear and to understand what another person is saying. Active listening is  less “me focused” and more “you focused”.

During active listening, you wait until the person speaking finishes before you speak. There are two benefits to this. One, it gives the person speaking a sense of relevance and completion. Two, it allows you to actually hear the whole conversation. As parents, we can easily get wrapped up in what we want to tell them instead of listening to what they have to say.

Focus on What They Are Saying

Chores are about being responsible. So, if we want our kids to become more responsible, we should become more responsible ourselves. And, a part of being responsible is being open to listening to our own children.

Life can be hectic. There are so many things that can take our focus away from the person talking to us. However, we need to make sure that we are listening to our kids. Many times, children only wants someone to listen to what they have to say. That someone should be you.

Be Understanding

While your children are talking, be understanding. You may not agree with everything they say but remember this isn’t the time to start an argument. Don’t be too judgmental. Respect your children’s feelings, beliefs, and opinions. Give them the same respect that you want them to give you.

Talk to your children in a positive tone. This does not mean that you can’t express disapproval. You can. However, check your tone before doing so. If you are upset and yelling, your kids may feel threatened, and either shut down completely or emulate your behavior and start yelling. This is not what you want to do. The whole point of doing the chores with your kids is to build relationships. When you are calm and attentive…without judgment…your children are more likely to listen to what you have to say.

Don’t Nag

While you and the children are working on the chores, be sure that you don’t nag. Don’t turn chore time into a time for lecture. None of this is giving in to your children.

One of my favorite books to reference is Steve Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. In this book, it explains how to truly listen to other people. You can use it to help you get a better understanding of how to talk to your children.

Teach Manners

This is also a great opportunity for you to demonstrate manners to your children. Show them what it means to be polite. When they finish their assigned chore, say “Thank You”. Be sure to encourage them by saying, “Wow, you did a great job today”. Give him or her a pat on the back or even a fist bump. If they're still little kids,  you might even want to give them a hug or a kiss. This is modeling respect.

Show Love and Compassion

The whole point of doing chores with your children is to build bonds and to connect. This is one of the best opportunities to let your kids know that you love them. You can do this by outright telling them that you love them. If you are dealing with teens or tweens, you may be faced with a lot of grunts and complaints. Ignore all grunts of the complaints. Nothing could be ickier to tweens or teenagers than to have your parent telling you that they love you.

Stay connected with your kids by doing chores with them. Encourage your kids to talk. Listen while they are talking. Don’t judge. Don’t nag. Instead, strengthen or build bonds.

Article to Read:

7 Reasons Why Kids Should Have Chores

https://www.momentumlife.co.nz/stories/why-kids-should-have-chores

Book to Read: 

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change

https://www.amazon.com/Habits-Highly-Effective-People-Powerful/dp/1451639619/ref=sr_1_4?crid=2KEV9SO1AWCPE&keywords=7+habits+of+highly+effective+people&qid=1658363642&sprefix=7+habits%2Caps%2C127&sr=8-4

Summer Break Staycation Ideas for Kemper County, Mississippi

 

Things to Do In Kemper County, Mississippi

Summer is finally here, and the hot Mississippi weather can make you want to stay inside . The long awaited break from school can mean a quick getaway or some much needed time at home. If you are on Summer Break…or even if you’re not…but you are not ready for a major vacation yet, there are some fun and inexpensive things that you and your kids can do right here in Kemper County, Mississippi.

 

Where in the World is Kemper County…

Kemper County is located in the United States of America in the South. It is on the central eastern border. It is on the Alabama state line. It has two cities, DeKalb and Scooba.  

 https://www.kempercounty.com/

So, what can you possibly do in this little, cozy, southern county? Here are a few ideas for your quiet town staycation.

 

Tea/Garden Party

Grab some sweet tea, a plate of “tea cakes”, and head out for a southern style garden party. Kemper County is mainly a rural area, so we don’t have a shortage of vegetable nor flower gardens.

 

Your garden party can be hosted by your actual garden, or you can consider some alternatives. One alternative is to host your garden party near your flower garden instead of near your vegetable garden. Let’s not forget that the back yard.

 

Make some finger foods like mini-sandwiches, cookies, “tea cakes”, and chips to serve to any guests that you might invite. Don’t forget the sweet tea or tall glass of homemade lemonade. Then, all that’s left to do is round-up some guests.

 

What is a “tea cake”?

Tea cakes are a southern tradition that originated in England. These tiny, buttery delights were once served with tea. However, here in the South, they are served as a special treat. Most “tea cake” recipes have been tenderly guarded and handed down for generations.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PpQhrskRHm0

Nature Walk

Nature can be found in abundance here in Kemper County. The summer weather can get a little hot, but if you pick the right day and time a nature walk is a great way to spend a summer staycation.

 

Be sure to prepare before heading out. Grab your bottled water, some bug spray, a good communication device, a map (if needed) and head off on a nature walking adventure. Always be sure to check the weather and the area. You don’t want to get caught in  by a “pop up” shower. You also want to avoid snakes and any other creatures what could be dangerous.

 

Most importantly, let someone else know where you are go. Double check communication devices before you go. Remember, safety first.

 

Fishing

Fishing can be a relaxing adventure this Summer Break. Whether you want to head to the bank of a creek or you want to head to a larger area, Kemper County can offer you some ideal fishing spots.

 

Kemper Lake is located on 652 acre four miles north of the county seat of DeKalb. It can provide a picturesque spot for fishing, relaxing, or taking pictures with its calming blue waters.

Sewing

Sewing is a southern tradition. And, no, it hasn’t died out over the years. Purchasing cheaper imported goods may have been the norm, but the pandemic helped to bring sewing back to the forefront. As needs for masks and “shelter-in-place” orders went into effect, people begin to pull out their sewing machines.

 

If sewing is your thing, Kemper is the place to do it. The Village Cloth Shoppe has a wide variety of cloth. It is a sewer’s dream. It cozy, little shop is a family owned and operated store. It is an intrigant part of what makes Kemper County so special. The Village Cloth Shoppe has been open since 1971. It was founded by Ola Mae Botts, and it is currently ran by her daughter, Carolyn Botts Hobgood.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8zinFbgPXo

Journaling

Now is a great time to start a Gratitude Journal. While you are relaxing and enjoying some much needed time away from work, you can also spend some time reflecting upon all of the things that you are grateful for. Journaling has been shown to help reduce stress and create a sense of calm in those who do it.

You don’t have to spend a whole lot of money on a large, fancy journal. You can use a table you purchase from one of our local stores.

 

Blogging

Have you thought about starting a blog? Well, now is the time to do just that. Blogging is a wonderful way to share your ideas and feelings with the world. It is similar to journaling. However, blogging is not private. Blogs are posted on the World Wide Web. Best of all, blogging can be done from anywhere that there is internet access.

 

Take this time to find a hosting site that you like and go ahead and create your own WordPress blog. WordPress blogs generally cost from as little as $35.00 per month. It is important to create your own website if you are considering making blogging a career.

 

However, if you don’t have the money to invest at the moment, then consider using Eblogger. (blogspot.com). Eblogger is a free website. It is owned by Google. And, it is perfect for beginners who only want to blog as a hobby.

 

Scrapbooking

Gather those favorite photos of your and start a scrapbook. A summer staycation is a great time to put together those photos that you want to hold on to.

Scrapbooks aren’t just for old memories. You can create one using new photos. You can use your camera or your smartphone to take pictures for your scrapbook. Be sure to capture plenty great pictures of our county.

 

Summer Photography Journal

How do you create a summer photo journal? Simple take some pictures of your favorite summer things like flowers, birds, or other greenery here in Kemper County. Our county courthouse is surrounded by beautiful magnolia trees and boasts a historical walkway. The Veteran’s  Memorial Engraved Walkway is located in the front of the Kemper County Court House. Deer, turkey, birds, and other wildlife photos can be captured to add to a photo journal.

You can either print the pictures or create a digital journal. Jot down a few memorable things about your pictures. Now, you have created a beautiful spring photo journal that you can share.

 

Kemper-Newton Regional Library

The Kemper County library may not be historical site…not yet anyway…but it is an important part of Kemper County. During your summer staycation, make sure you stop by.

The library has a children’s area, a meeting room, and a general room. It also has a ton of books. So, if you are planning on doing some reading this summer, drop in on the library.

If you are plan on staying in Kemper County this Summer Break, you can still find some fun, inexpensive things to do. Happy Summer Break!

 

 Articles to read:

The Best Southern Tea Cake Recipe Ever: 

https://grandbaby-cakes.com/southern-tea-cakes/

Simple Ways for You to Improve Your Mood This Summer

 

18 Things to Help Improve Your Mood This Summer

We all experience “the blues” sometimes. Although “SAD” or Seasonal Affective Disorder is more common in the winter months, people can experience some bouts of depression during the summertime.

You may find yourself feeling out of sorts and needing to adjust your mood. Don’t fall victim to “the blues” this summer. Improve your mood and overall well-being. Here are a few suggestions on how to do just that.

Get More Sunlight

Who can beat that great summer sun? Get out and enjoy the beautiful sunshine this summer. How can sunlight improve your mood? Exposure to sunlight helps the body release serotonin. Serotonin is a hormone in the body that can help to stable your mood. It has even been shown to help you sleep better.

Depending on the month, summer can get pretty hot especially if you live in the South. However, there is a way for you to get that much needed sunshine and stay cool. Instead of go outside during the hottest time of the day, you should opt to wait for the evening time or head out in the early morning before the temperatures rise.

Drink More Water

Staying hydrated is vital during the hot, summer months. Our bodies are made up of mainly water. Water helps to keep our joints lubricated. It provides a cushion for the brain, spinal cord, and other body tissues. Staying hydrate will also help you to maintain a stable body temperature, and it will help to keep your blood pressure regulated.

So, before heading out, grab a bottle of water. Plus, consider taking your water with you. Large, plastic water containers can be taken along with you to work, on nature walks, or any other place. A lot of these containers have water levels marked on them. They can help you measure the amount of water you consume.

Go for a Walk

The flowers have bloomed, and the birds are singing. Nature can do wonders for your mood. It’s beauty has a calming effect that can’t be denied. Taking a walk out in nature, going to your local gym, or simply walking around your work space can help to relieve stress and anxiety.  It can also provide you with the opportunity to relax and reflect. Both of which can also help to improve your general well-being. So, go for that walk.

Take a Drive

If you can’t go for a walk, you can always go for a leisurely drive. Plan your drive. Don’t simply up and decide to go for a drive on the freeway in the middle of midday traffic. This drive should be on your day off and during a time when traffic is at a minimum.

If at all possible, try to make this drive out in the country where you can better enjoy the peace and serenity that nature has to offer. Be sure to put on some of your favorite music. This will help to relax you while you are driving.

Get Enough Sleep

Your brain needs sleep in order to allow its neurons to recharge and keep functioning at their best. Going without sleep for 24 hours or longer can result in behavior similar to that of being intoxicated.  Body functions become impaired. Slurred speech, lack of impulse control, poor judgment, and decreased attention are all the results of not getting enough sleep. And, just like a person who is legally drunk, you should not be behind the wheel. Your reflexes are slower.  Your coordination is off. Your vision and your judgment are impaired. All of which can lead to an accident.

Your brain must have deep sleep and not just a quick nod in order for the neurons of the cerebral cortex to recharge and keep functioning at optimal levels. The ability to recall information and retain new memories is impaired when these neuron are not allowed to repair themselves. Getting enough sleep will also help to decrease stress hormones and help you to feel more energized.

Read

Reading a book or even listening to one on tape is a great way to help you settle down and relax. Don’t try to force yourself to read something overly complicated. Pick a book that you will enjoy. Any simple, easy-to-read book will do.

Journal

Put your thoughts down on paper. Journaling is a wonderful way to relax and decompress. Your journal doesn’t have to be anything complicated. Even a simply tablet or notebook can be turned into a place to keep your ideas, thoughts, and feelings.

A gratitude journal is going to work the best. Instead of focusing on the negative things going on in your life, you can focus on the things that you are grateful for. This will help to combat negative feelings and any pinup frustrations.

Visualize

Create a relaxing image in your mind. Visualize yourself happy and fulfilled. You might even want to post pictures of things that make you happy around your desk or on your refrigerator so that you can continuously be reminded to stay calm and to be happy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWp13iFjmcU&t=123s

Think Positive

Kick those negative thoughts to the curb. Refuse to think on the negative things. Think on the positive. This can sometimes be easier said than done. However, you can do it. But, you will have to make a conscious effort to focus on the things that are going right instead of the things that are going wrong. The gratitude journal can help you do this. Start each day by thinking about the things that you are thankful for. Think about the things that make you happy or give you joy. Try to see each obstacle or disappointment that you face as a nudge toward your destiny. Know that no matter what happens, it is all working for your good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvmZDYeIu38&t=105s

Vacation

Grab your bags and go on vacation. Your vacation doesn’t have to be anything extraordinary. Any overnight trip away from home can be turned into a vacation.

You may even decide to take a staycation and visit some sites in your local areas. If you can’t take an actual vacation and get away from the house, consider renting a hotel room for the night. You’ll be amazed at how much better you will feel by just leaving home.

Reconnect with Old Friends

Now is a good time to reach out to some old friends. Reconnect. Work on repairing any problems that caused the rift. Prioritize your friendships. Make it a point to spend more time with your friends.

Go to the Movies

Summer and movies go hand in hand. Take a trip to the theater or set up a projector in your own home. Watch a movie that you’ve been dying to see. You can make this a family outing, or you can be a “lone ranger.” And, don’t forget to grab a bag of popcorn!

Hobbies

Make time for your hobbies. Do the things that make you happy. Summer hobbies can include gardening, quilting, collecting seashells, and dancing. It does not matter if this is a new hobby or an old one, just get into the swing of things.  

Take a Course

Learn something new. Consider taking a course over the break. And, this course doesn’t have to be something hard or difficult. This should be relaxing, so pick something that will bring you happiness.

Classes can be taken in person or online. The advantage of an online course is the fact that it can be completed from almost anywhere that has an internet connection.

Decrease Sugar Consumption

Sugar is not only addictive. It can contribute to weight gain. Plus, getting too much of it can lead to heart disease, diabetes, and even put you at risk for developing mood disorders. Instead of reaching for the sugar, try eating more fresh or dry fruits.

https://www.webmd.com/diet/what-to-know-about-sugar-and-depression

Stop drinking so many sodas. Studies have shown that consuming just one can soda a day can led to a 20 pound weight gain in one year.

Sodas also contain caffeine. Caffeine is a diuretic, and it can lead to dehydration. Instead of the reaching for that can of soda drink, water or natural fruit juice. They will help to keep you hydrated. Plus, they don’t have the additional sugar that sodas have.

Eat more fresh fruits and vegetables

Eat healthy. Summer is the perfect time to load up on fruits and vegetables. Most vegetables are high in fiber. Fiber helps to keep things moving through your digestive system. It also helps your body remove those toxics, and it helps to stabilize your weight. So, load up on those fruits and vegetables. You can even dabble in growing your own during this warm weather season.

Set the Mood

Get in a relaxing state of mind. You can use candles, soft music, and aroma therapy to help you relax. House plants and neutral tones can also be used to bring your mind into a calm space. Be sure to remove any noise, clutter, or other distractions.

Create a routine for relaxing. Choose a designated place to relax and a set time for relaxation. This will help to program your body to wind down.

Forgive

If you are holding any grudges or other negative feelings, release them. Unforgiveness can ruin your overall health. You may be holding on to some unresolved resentment and bitterness. Unforgiveness can lead to migraine headaches, upset stomach, anxiety, and indigestion. If you want to feel better, then you will need to forgive.

Forgive the people who have wronged you. Open your heart and mind to new beginnings. Move forward.

Improve the way you feel this summer and throughout the year. Make a few adjustments to your behavior and boost your mood. These adjustments can include change your diet from one filled with sugar and processed foods to a healthier one. Get some sun and some exercise. This will help release those feel-good hormones. Put down the soda and reach for the water instead. This will help to keep you hydrated and flush the toxins from your body. Take up a hobby or resume an old one. Reconnect with old friends. Make relationships a priority and set the mood for relaxation.

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. Information give is advice from my own personal experience. For any serious medical advice

 

How to Host a Garden/Tea Party for Your Kids This Summer

 

How To Host a Garden/Tea Party with Your Kids

Summer is here! The weather is warm and perfect for hosting outdoor events. So, use the warm weather and beautiful outdoors to help keep you and your kids entertained this summer. And, if there’s one thing that we southerners know how to do, it’s get together with our family and friends for an outdoors event. So, this summer plan a fun, Garden/Tea Party with your kids.

What is a Garden/Tea Party?

Most of us have heard of a “Garden/Tea Party”. And, in your mind, you might think about little girls and their dolls. However, this is not that type of party. A Garden/Tea Party is an outdoor gathering that includes actually guests and not dolls. It is typically held near a garden.

This party does not have to be in or near a vegetable garden. It can be hosted near a flower garden as well. In truth, you don’t even have to be technically “outside” to host a garden party. All you need are some guests and warm weather.

Choose the Style

You will need to decide what type of party you are hosting. There are a variety of options. Here are a few:

*Casual

You can choose to host a picnic style Garden/Tea Party with basket lunches and nice, sturdy paper plates or you can do something simple but elegant for your young guests. The dress code is casual. Shorts or jeans and t-shirts are appropriate. Sundress and other comfy, cozy clothes may be worn.

*Semi-formal

Everyone can get dressed up in semi-formal attire and make it a real “social event”. In this incidents, you and your kids will wear clothes that weren’t too dressy but that go beyond your basic shorts and t-shirts. Sundresses are still appropriate as long as you elevate them by adding some nice jewelry and shoes. This type of garden party is more along the lines of an actual “ Southern Tea Party”.

*Formal

Let’s get dressed up! If you decide to go formal, then you’ll want to let your guests know that the garden party is a formal gathering. This  way your child’s friends will know to come in their best dresses and not just every day clothes. This type of garden party is more common with wedding, engagements, and other important social events where the participants dress very formal and the decorations for this party follows strict guidelines.

Choose a Theme

Okay, themes can be optional especially when planning a “Garden/Tea Party for your kids and their friends. Your kids will be more excited about getting to hang out with their friends outside than picking a theme for the party. However, if you want to scale things up a notch and teach your kids about planning and budgeting, you can choose a theme for your party.

*Americana

If you want, you can go “All American”. You can add a touch of Americana by using foods that are commonly associated with picnics like hot dogs, hamburgers, water, and soda. Of course, if you’re doing the Americana theme, you’ll want to use red, white, and blue as your party colors. These are great for around holidays like Memorial Day, Veteran’s Day, and Independence Day.

Seasonal

It may be summer, but you can host a Garden/Tea Party during at least three season out of the year: spring, summer, and fall. And, with the various season, you can choose a color them to match the season in which you are hosting your party.

You would choose pretty pastels for spring. But, don’t shy away from adding some bold colors into the mix to spice things up.

Summer and warmer weather dictates that you use bolder colors. Neon colors and loud yellows, reds, and greens are some of summer’s most noted colors.

Fall brings the darker, rustic colors like brown, orange, golden-yellow, and emerald-green. Don’t forget to add a splash of intrigue by adding a few sprinkled of lighter colors.

Classical Themes

The themes to choose from are limitless. You can go “Disney princess”, “Beach”, “Harvest time”, or even “Back to School”. It’s all up to you and your children. Just make sure that you are having fun while planning your Garden Party.  

Choose the Area

Next, you’ll want to choose the spot for your Garden Party. Remember most Garden/Tea Parties are held outdoors. However, you can use a “work around” to get a similar effect.

·        Flower Garden

You can host your party near a flower garden. Beautiful flowers and flourishing plants can make any outdoors activity look even more picturesque. And, a flower garden would be ideal of a “traditional” Garden Party.

When planning for this style Garden Party, you will have to take into consideration the possible visits from pollinators and other insects. So, precautions should be taken to prevent them interrupting your fun.

·        Park

Your Garden Party doesn’t have to be held at your home. You can move your celebration to another location. Your local park can be a great place to host a party. Check with your local park and see if you can reserve the area. A park is less formal, and often, it will have picnic tables that you can use for your gathering. If you want, you can add some table clothes to help give the spot a party feel. This spot can also provide you and your guests with entertainment if live shows or other events happen to be planned for the same time.

 The thing that I love the most, and you will too, is that you don’t have to clean your home or yard afterwards. This isn’t to say leave the park dirty. You will definitely need to clean up behind yourself and any of your guests.

·        Backyard/front yard

There’s no place like home! Your own yard or garden can be the ideal place to host your party. It depends on location of your house to help you determine whether to use your front or backyard for your gathering.

The traffic flow near your party needs to be taken into immediate consideration since this is a party for kids. Ideally, you want to choose an area that will have the least amount of traffic. Small children can easily become distracted. So, you want to make sure that you have taken the right safety precautions.

Decorations

The type of decorations you use are all up to you. The decorations you use will all depend upon whatever theme you decide to go with. If you want to keep the heat to a minimum and you want to emphasize nature, light, airy colors are generally a good way to go.

Food  

Think tea party when planning your Garden Party. Since this is a party for your kids, you want to think small…as in “mini”. You can use mini-sandwiches, fruit, small salads, and other finger foods for your outdoors event. Cupcakes, cookies, and chips are always a hit with young children.

You can get your kids involved in the meal planning process. Even younger kids can help to prepare some simple dishes. This will provide a great opportunity for bonding. It is also a wonderful time to discuss family recipes and family history. You can also sneak in a math lesson or two while you are prepping the food.

You may want to go all out. The menu for your Garden/Tea party is all up to you. So, if you have decided to host an extravagant party, you may even want to consider having your event catered.

Drinks

What type of drink goes best with a Garden Party? Homemade lemonade or sweet tea will give your party a true outdoors feel. And, if you live in the South, you know the importance of fresh sweet tea.

Water is always a great addition to any event. You can have pitchers of it available or you can use mini-water bottles. Try to avoid sodas if you can. However, the beverages for your party is up to you.

Invitations

Have fun sending out invitations to your event. Invitations can be formally done, or they can be the unique creation of your kids.

An entire craft designing activity can be created for your kids when you let them design and personalize the invitations for the party.

Formal invitations can be purchased from a local store. They can be create and printed online on your home computer or you can have them custom made.

Whether you decide to host a formal or informal Garden/Tea Party, you are sure to have a great time this summer. A word of advice. Be sure to use insect repellant torches, candles, or plants to keep those pesky, uninvited critters from stopping by.