How
do you rebuild trust? How do you move forward in a friendship or even a company
when there has been a breach of confidence? In this article, we will discuss
the ways to rebuild trust within our school, within our school district, with
our parents, and with our students.
Acknowledge
that there is a problem
Once
trust has been broken within your school, the first thing you need to do is to
acknowledge that there's a problem. Then, find out what caused the problem.
Next, move forward with trying to fix that problem. Now is the time to go ahead
and have those hard conversations. No, they are not pleasant, but you have to
do it if you are going to rebuild trust within your organization.
Create
an Atmosphere of Safety
Make
sure that everyone involved feels comfortable to be open and honest. They have to
know that they are safe to talk about their feelings. They have to feel safe to
talk about what happened and what needs to be done in order to fix the
situation.
Admit
Mistakes
Be
willing to admit any mistakes. Be willing to acknowledge the indiscretion.
Discuss ways to move past it.
Don’t
Play the Blame Game
Don’t
assign blame to anyone unless it is you. Allow the man or woman who caused the violation
to own up to their part in the incident.
Respect
Guideline
Respect
the opinions of those involved in those tough conversations.
We
are not all going to get along. We are going to have to accept that. Other
people have different opinions and/or different beliefs. We are not identical
duplicates of each other. Everyone needs to respect each other’s opinions. You
can do that by establishing guidelines of respect.
Consistency
is Key
You
also must make sure that you are consistent. You are going to have to do what
you said you are going to do when you said you were going do it. And, you are
going to have to do it over and over again. You can’t be consistent for a day
or a week or even a month. You have to remain consistent every time.
Be
Willing to Forgive
Hurt
has been caused. Wounds have been inflicted. Chaos has ensued. Nevertheless, you
have to be willing to forgive. You have to be willing to leave those hurt
feelings in the past and move forward so that healing can begin.
However,
I am not asking anyone to forget. The reason that you are not going to forget is,
so you don't make the same mistake again. But, you have to forgive this person.
You have to forgive the company…you have to forgive whatever it is.
Move
Forward
You
have to move forward. You can't be held hostage by the past. Once you have identified
the problem and had those difficult conversations, you have to be willing to
think beyond myself. You have to look at the whole picture.
Things
Won’t be the Same
Accept
that things are not going to be the same. You are going to have to rebuild. You
are going to have to reestablish trust.
It
can be difficult to rebuild trust. However, it can be done. It will take time.
You start by identifying the problem and working with your team to discover ways
to fix the problem.
Who
would have thought that ingredients as simple as butter, flour, sugar, and vanilla
could create one of the South’s greatest delights…a teacake. Most of us have
memories of eating these tasty treats. Whether they were made for a special
occasion or as a part of the Sunday dinner, they evoke feelings of warmth and
comfort. So, what the story behind the “Southern Teacake”?
Tea
Cakes were originally from England. These delicacies were
served along with tea. The English teacake is different from the ones that most
southerners are familiar with. Our teacakes are made similar to a sugar cookie.
However, the original teacakes from England were more of a like a bun with some
type of fruit. These teacakes were cut and served with butter.
It
seems several countries have their own version of “teacake”. The Scottish teacake
is more like a biscuit. Its top is mainly a chocolate covered marshmallow with
a biscuit base.
It
does matter how teacakes are made in other places. Here in the south, our
beloved teacake is generally understood to be a buttery, sweet cookie. It’s history
here is long, and it’s roots run deep.
Have
you enjoyed a “teacake” lately? Regardless, be sure to preserve the family
recipe.
Check out the following:
How To Make Southern Tea Cakes / Old-fashioned Way
Teaching Your Kids Money Management this Holiday Season
Black
Friday and Cyber Monday is almost upon us! If you’ve ever taken your kids shopping
with you, then you know that trying to get them to understand the importance of
careful spending is almost impossible. The holidays can be especially difficult
with all those tempting items on full display. Even a disciplined adult can
find those Black Friday deals hard to resist. So, what do you do to keep your
kids from blowing the budget this holiday season?
Allowance
Start
with an allowance. Your kids need to know what it means to receive and manage
money. An allowance is a great place to begin teaching them about financial responsibility.
Setting
and keeping financial goals
Your children are more likely to stick to the budget
if they have something to work toward. You can help your kids set financial
goals. Maybe, they are working toward that hot, new electronic game or some
other piece of tech gear. Maybe, they simply want to buy toys. No matter what
their goals are, you should sit down with them and help them to figure out how
much money it will take for them to accomplish this goal.
Distinguishing Between Wants and Needs
Our kids can have a hard time discerning wants from
needs especially during the holidays.I
use the following technique to get my son to identify the difference: When he
asks me about making a purchase, I ask him these questions, “Is this an
absolute necessity? Will this fit into your budget? Will this help or hurt your
efforts to reach your financial goal?”Then, I make him wait at least 24 hours before making the purchase. This
gives him time to actually think about the purchase and decide if it is the
right one for his budget.
Visual
Reminders
“Out of sight,
out of mind.” It is easy to forget what your financial goals are when
confronted with things that offer instant
gratification. It can be hard to resist those designer
clothes or latest electronic gadget. I know it is for me. And, chances are
pretty good that your kids find it even harder. So, what is the solution? Keep
visual reminders.
You and your kids can keep a mini copy of your budget
with you while you shop. There are a variety of apps available for you to
choose from to help keep your goals visual.
Help them Create a Realistic Budget
Help your children create a budget. There are some great
budgeting apps out there to help your kids get on track with learning how to
manage their money. Some apps to consider are:
FamZoo
Rooster Money
Bankaroo
Piggy Bank
BusyKid
GoHenry
GreenLight
Be sure to check out this video by Brittany Flammer for
more information on these apps and to see if they are a good fit for you and
your kids:
My son is sixteen, and I want to teach him about
money without putting my money with his. I also want to teach him some simple
investing skills so,BusyKid is the app I’m most likely to get.
However, I still like to use pencil and paper first.
You can decide for yourself which way you like the best.
You can begin by having your children write down all
of the money that they have coming in. This should include their allowance,
gift money, or many from any odd jobs. Next, have your children list any expense
that you plan on having deducted from that money. This should definitely
include the things that they want to buy during the holiday season. Then, do
the math together. This will help give them a realistic idea of how much money they
have, how much the desire item costs, and if they can afford it. By helping
your children create budgets, you are helping them learn how to control impulse
spending.
Coupons
& Codes
Another way you can help your child to stick to the
budget is to help them look for valuable coupon codes or discounts on the things
they want to purchase. Some stores have rewards programs that reward its
members with discounts. These discounts can prove invaluable especially during
the holidays. Also, there are apps like Fetch and Ibotta
that give points to its users that can be redeemed later.
I have both apps. However, my favorite is Fetch.
It’s a little easier for me to understand than Ibotta. However,
again, this goes to preference. You can usually upload the same receipts on
both apps. The most important thing is that you download the apps and get
started saving. If you want to use my coupon code to get bonus points, be sure
to use the code listed below.
Lead by Example
You are your children’s first teacher. Be sure to
teach them the correct way to manage their money. Lead by example. Let them
join in while you prepare the family budget. As you or you and your spouse are
creating the family budget, explain to your kids what you are doing. Explain
why you have to put a certain amount of money back a week back for emergencies
or saving.
Let them see you downloading coupons and coupon
codes. Allow them to watch you use your discount codes and cards. Allow them to
pay for items using your codes.
Make Your Child Financially Responsible
Give your children some financial responsibility
this holiday. Make them responsible for purchasing some of the Christmas gifts
themselves. Make them purchase that coveted item with their own money. Show
them what paying bills entitle.
Savings Accounts & Investing
Now, is also a good time to open a saving or
checking account. Instead of letting them blow that Christmas money from
Grandpa, have them open a Saving Account. If possible, have them use some of
the money their money for investing in stock. This doesn’t have to be a large amount.
They can get started investing with as little as $10 or $20. This will teach
them financial accountability.
As
the holidays approach, it is so easy to get caught up in sales and other
gimmicks. Budgeting is difficult for adults, and your kids are definitely no
exception. Most children have little to no impulse control. However, you CAN
prevent your child from blowing the budget. Teach them valuable money
management skills this holiday season.
With
the rising cost of food, most of us are all feeling the burn. The grocery store
is no exception. In fact, it is one of the main places that our wallet is
feeling the burn. Digital coupons can help, but with inflation pushing prices
up, it’s going to take a money-saving strategy. Here are a few suggestions on ways
to keep your grocery bill from getting too far out of hand.
Having
a plan
Before
you head off into the store, have a strategic plan. Look through your sales circulars and make a
list of the items to be purchase.Check
your pantry and see what items you need.Making a menu for the coming week will also help you know what you will
need to purchase. Have a detailed list ready and a budget set before you hit
the store.This will save you both time
and money.
Sale
circulars
First
things first. Always check the sale circulars before heading off to the grocery
store. The sales papers contain the list of items that are on sale. Be sure to
get the circulars for more than one store and compare the prices. The same
items may be at a lower price at a different store. Thanks to technology you
don’t even have to get the actual paper. Most stores like Walmart and Walgreens
have website where you can easily check the price of different items and
compare them.
Consider
Grocery Pickup
Whether
you like grocery pickup or not, it is a way to help control your spending on
food. My ordering online you can easily monitor what is in your cart and how
much your groceries are going to cost before you check out. This will help to
ensure that you stick within your budget. When you go into a regular store, you
can easily get distracted. You may find yourself at the check out counter with
items, you didn’t mean to purchase. As a result, you may go beyond your budget.
Pet
Food
We
all love our pets, and it can be easy to forget about averaging in the pet’s
food with the grocery bill. Pet food can get to be extremely expensive, and it
can help wreck your grocery budget. I’ll be one of the first to admit that it’s
easy to overlook to forget about pet food. Figure out how much food your pet
are consuming and add this to your grocery bill.
Price
checking
Items
like milk, eggs, and sugar are grocery staples. The price on these items should
be check for at least two to three weeks in the stores in which you shop the
most often. Stores will often list items in a sale circular that are actually
regular price. By doing a price check for several weeks on these items, you can
identify if they are really on sale.
Budget
for inflation.
Since
prices have gone up, you will have to increase your allowance for food, or you
will have to cut back on the groceries that you buy. Inflation is over 8% at the
present. So, that means you should allow yourself an additional $8 to $10 per
month. That may not seem like a lot, but it can add up in the long run.
Buying
in bulk
When
a nonperishable items that your family uses regularly go on sale, buy them in
bulk from your regular stores. Various stores will often has staple items on
sale each week. When these sales hit, you should purchase at least 3 of the items
in order to stock up. If possible, purchase enough to last for several months. Believe
it or not you can actually freeze cheese, whipped cream, and other products.
Cheese should be shredded before freezing because the texture can change.
If
you really want to be smart, invest in a food vacuum. This will allow to vacuum
seal bulk purchases. Fruit unfortunately is perishable. So, unless you plan on
canning these items or create smoothies, only purchase them as you plan to use
them. Some people argue the case for freezing fruit. I am not one of those
people.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfncbdITnec
Check
Various Stores
Shopping
at more than one store has its advantages.Different stores can have different staple items on sale. By shopping at
more than one store, you can get several items at a low price. Also, this helps
you to identify who has the best deal on a product.
Be
Mindful of the Meat
For
most of us, meat is the main part of our meals. Unfortunately, meat is the most
expensive item on our grocery lists. You can help keep your grocery bill low by
rethinking the way you look at meat. Instead of making meat your main item for
meals, consider it a side dish. Decrease the portion size you put on your
plates and bulk up on vegetables and other side dishes. Another option is to go
meatless one meal per week.
Monitor
Your Receipts
Be
sure to check your store receipts.Some
receipts have coupons that print out on them or promotional offers. Store receipts
may also have surveys on them, and they offer free items as rewards for
answering the survey.Checking receipts
will also ensure that you are getting an item for the correct price.Mistakes do happen at the checkout.
Stop
Impulse Shopping
Don’t
be drawn in by those mini-items at the check-out line. They have been
strategically placed there to get your attention while you are waiting in line
to check out. Stick to your shopping list.
Only
buy what you need. Don’t buy an item just because it is on sell. If it isn’t on
your shopping list for the week, leave it in the store.
Grocery
prices are at an all-time high. Inflation is forcing many of us to become more mindful
of our shopping habits. So, before you head off to the grocery store be sure
that you have a strategic plan in place and a set budget for your trip. Happy
shopping.
Staying connected to our children is important. One
of the ways that we can do that is by doing chores with them. Trust me. I am
aware that you gave you gave your kids chores to teach them responsibility, and
you might want them to complete them on their own. However, doing chores with
your kids is a time for you guys to bond and to connect.
Let me explain. It really isn’t about the chores.
It’s more about spending time with your children and building bonds. Encourage
your child to talk to you while you're doing your chores. So, it doesn’t
matter if you are doing the dishes or cleaning the bathroom together. What
matters most is that you are communicating.
The Purpose of Chores
What’s the big deal about chores anyway? Well, chores
have a lot of merit. Chores teach your children real world skills. These are
skills that they will need and use for the rest of their lives. Those skills
include responsibility, work ethics, self-reliance, and time management.
By holding them accountable for their chores,
you are teaching your kids to take ownership for their actions. This in turn
will help to teach them responsibility and help them to develop a good
work ethic for later in life.
Tasks such a doing the laundry, budgeting, and
washing dishes are life skills. By learning how to complete these tasks,
your children will learn how to be self-reliant.
Time management can be taught through chores.
When you children have to learn how to complete homework and still get their
chores done, they learn how to management their time more effectively.
When I was in high school, I played basketball and that
often meant having to complete homework and still being able to compete in
sports. I can remember one of my teammates working on homework while we drove to
the upcoming game. Plus, she was still responsible for chores when she got
home. She was a phenomenal athlete and a great student. Her parents had
adequately taught her how to manage her time.
By doing chores with your children, you can help them
to become better at time management. And, you are also teaching them other
skills that they will need later.
Open the Lines of Communication
If this is something new and you want to reconnect
with your kids, start slow. Begin by asking them a few simple questions.
ØAsk them
how their day was.
ØAsk them
if they have any concerns or other issues.
ØAsk them
about school.
ØAsk them
about their friends.
It really doesn’t matter what you ask them about. The
goal is to get them to talk to you. As you continue this routine, your kids and
you will become more comfortable sharing chores and talking.
Actively Listen
Be
sure to listen actively. What it mean to listen actively? Active listening
means to make a conscious effort to hear and to understand what another person
is saying. Active listening isless “me
focused” and more “you focused”.
During
active listening, you wait until the person speaking finishes before you speak.
There are two benefits to this. One, it gives the person speaking a sense of
relevance and completion. Two, it allows you to actually hear the whole
conversation. As parents, we can easily get wrapped up in what we want to tell
them instead of listening to what they have to say.
Focus
on What They Are Saying
Chores
are about being responsible. So, if we want our kids to become more
responsible, we should become more responsible ourselves. And, a part of being
responsible is being open to listening to our own children.
Life
can be hectic. There are so many things that can take our focus away from the
person talking to us. However, we need to make sure that we are listening to
our kids. Many times, children only wants someone to listen to what they
have to say. That someone should be you.
Be Understanding
While your
children are talking, be understanding. You may not agree with everything they say
but remember this isn’t the time to start an argument. Don’t be too judgmental.
Respect your children’s feelings, beliefs, and opinions. Give them the same
respect that you want them to give you.
Talk to
your children in a positive tone. This does not mean that you
can’t express disapproval. You can. However, check your tone before doing so.
If you are upset and yelling, your kids may feel threatened, and either shut
down completely or emulate your behavior and start yelling. This is not what
you want to do. The whole point of doing the chores with your kids is to build relationships.
When you are calm and attentive…without judgment…your children are more
likely to listen to what you have to say.
Don’t Nag
While you and the children are working on the chores,
be sure that you don’t nag. Don’t turn chore time into a time for lecture. None
of this is giving in to your children.
One of my favorite books to reference is Steve
Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. In this book, it
explains how to truly listen to other people. You can use it to help you get a
better understanding of how to talk to your children.
Teach Manners
This is also a great opportunity for you to
demonstrate manners to your children. Show them what it means to be polite. When
they finish their assigned chore, say “Thank You”. Be sure to encourage them by
saying, “Wow, you did a great job today”. Give him or her a pat on the back or
even a fist bump. If they're still little kids, you might even want to give them a hug or a
kiss. This is modeling respect.
Show Love and Compassion
The whole point of doing chores with your children is
to build bonds and to connect. This is one of the best opportunities to let
your kids know that you love them. You can do this by outright telling them
that you love them. If you are dealing with teens or tweens, you may be faced
with a lot of grunts and complaints. Ignore all grunts of the complaints.
Nothing could be ickier to tweens or teenagers than to have your parent telling
you that they love you.
Stay connected with your kids by doing chores with
them. Encourage your kids to talk. Listen while they are talking. Don’t judge. Don’t
nag. Instead, strengthen or build bonds.
Summer
is finally here, and the hot Mississippi weather can make you want to stay
inside . The long awaited break from school can mean a quick getaway or some
much needed time at home. If you are on Summer Break…or even if you’re not…but
you are not ready for a major vacation yet, there are some fun and inexpensive things
that you and your kids can do right here in Kemper County, Mississippi.
Where
in the World is Kemper County…
Kemper
County is located in the United States of America in the South. It is on the
central eastern border. It is on the Alabama state line. It has two cities,
DeKalb and Scooba.
So,
what can you possibly do in this little, cozy, southern county? Here are a few
ideas for your quiet town staycation.
Tea/Garden
Party
Grab
some sweet tea, a plate of “tea cakes”, and head out for a southern
style garden party. Kemper County is mainly a rural area, so we don’t have a
shortage of vegetable nor flower gardens.
Your
garden party can be hosted by your actual garden, or you can consider some
alternatives. One alternative is to host your garden party near your flower
garden instead of near your vegetable garden. Let’s not forget that the back
yard.
Make
some finger foods like mini-sandwiches, cookies, “tea cakes”, and chips to
serve to any guests that you might invite. Don’t forget the sweet tea or tall
glass of homemade lemonade. Then, all that’s left to do is round-up some
guests.
What
is a “tea cake”?
Tea
cakes are a southern tradition that originated in England. These tiny, buttery
delights were once served with tea. However, here in the South, they are served
as a special treat. Most “tea cake” recipes have been tenderly guarded and
handed down for generations.
Nature
can be found in abundance here in Kemper County. The summer weather can get a
little hot, but if you pick the right day and time a nature walk is a great way
to spend a summer staycation.
Be
sure to prepare before heading out. Grab your bottled water, some bug spray, a
good communication device, a map (if needed) and head off on a nature walking
adventure. Always be sure to check the weather and the area. You don’t want to
get caught in by a “pop up” shower. You
also want to avoid snakes and any other creatures what could be dangerous.
Most
importantly, let someone else know where you are go. Double check communication
devices before you go. Remember, safety first.
Fishing
Fishing
can be a relaxing adventure this Summer Break. Whether you want to head to the
bank of a creek or you want to head to a larger area, Kemper County can offer
you some ideal fishing spots.
Kemper
Lake
is located on 652 acre four miles north of the county seat of DeKalb. It can
provide a picturesque spot for fishing, relaxing, or taking pictures with its
calming blue waters.
Sewing
Sewing
is a southern tradition. And, no, it hasn’t died out over the years. Purchasing
cheaper imported goods may have been the norm, but the pandemic helped to bring
sewing back to the forefront. As needs for masks and “shelter-in-place” orders
went into effect, people begin to pull out their sewing machines.
If
sewing is your thing, Kemper is the place to do it. The Village Cloth Shoppe
has a wide variety of cloth. It is a sewer’s dream. It cozy, little shop is a
family owned and operated store. It is an intrigant part of what makes Kemper
County so special. The VillageCloth Shoppe has been open since
1971. It was founded by Ola Mae Botts, and it is currently ran by her
daughter, Carolyn Botts Hobgood.
Now
is a great time to start a Gratitude Journal. While you are relaxing and
enjoying some much needed time away from work, you can also spend some time
reflecting upon all of the things that you are grateful for. Journaling has
been shown to help reduce stress and create a sense of calm in those who do it.
You
don’t have to spend a whole lot of money on a large, fancy journal. You can use
a table you purchase from one of our local stores.
Blogging
Have
you thought about starting a blog? Well, now is the time to do just that. Blogging
is a wonderful way to share your ideas and feelings with the world. It is similar
to journaling. However, blogging is not private. Blogs are posted on the World
Wide Web. Best of all, blogging can be done from anywhere that there is internet
access.
Take
this time to find a hosting site that you like and go ahead and create your own
WordPress blog. WordPress blogs generally cost from as little as $35.00
per month. It is important to create your own website if you are considering
making blogging a career.
However,
if you don’t have the money to invest at the moment, then consider using Eblogger. (blogspot.com). Eblogger is a free website. It is owned by Google. And, it is perfect for
beginners who only want to blog as a hobby.
Scrapbooking
Gather
those favorite photos of your and start a scrapbook. A summer staycation is a
great time to put together those photos that you want to hold on to.
Scrapbooks
aren’t just for old memories. You can create one using new photos. You can use
your camera or your smartphone to take pictures for your scrapbook. Be sure to
capture plenty great pictures of our county.
Summer
Photography Journal
How
do you create a summer photo journal? Simple take some pictures of your
favorite summer things like flowers, birds, or other greenery here in Kemper
County. Our county courthouse is surrounded by beautiful magnolia trees and
boasts a historical walkway. TheVeteran’sMemorial Engraved Walkway is located in the
front of the Kemper County Court House. Deer, turkey, birds,
and other wildlife photos can be captured to add to a photo journal.
You
can either print the pictures or create a digital journal. Jot down a few
memorable things about your pictures. Now, you have created a beautiful spring
photo journal that you can share.
Kemper-Newton Regional Library
The Kemper County library may not
be historical site…not yet anyway…but it is an important part of Kemper County.
During your summer staycation, make sure you stop by.
The library has a children’s area,
a meeting room, and a general room. It also has a ton of books. So, if you are planning
on doing some reading this summer, drop in on the library.
If
you are plan on staying in Kemper County this Summer Break, you can still find
some fun, inexpensive things to do. Happy Summer Break!
